The mind of an over-thinker
I'm an over thinker.
I used to be worse but since training in Myers Briggs and NLP I've tamed the unconscious voice in my head, but sometimes it still comes and gets me.
My over thinking usually relates to people, have I offended them? What do they think? Why did they say that? Why did they do that? Why did they look at me like that?
I can wake in the night reliving an event from 15 years ago or wake cringing at something I did as a teenager.
Since undertaking Time Line Therapy TM and training in it, I've found dealing with emotions of anger, sadness, fear, hurt and guilt much better, but other things pop in my head.
Today I was in a world of my own, I woke at 4am and was tired most of the day. Then the inner voice sees a weak opportunity and the chatter started. It began with "Did I blank the postman?" For the life of me I couldn't remember if I'd said hello or not. It bugged me and rolled around in my head. I think I did say hello, but I'm pretty sure the post man wouldn't care less if I did or didn't.
And this is how the inner voice of doubt and criticism can creep in. This wasn't important, in fact it was the only doubt my self-doubt fairy could actually find in my head, but I know how a tiny thing like that in the past could consume me. Worried I'd hurt someones feelings. I remember in my past apologising to people for something, and them looking at me like I was a nutter as they had no idea what I was apologising for.
Now I know to focus on me. I knew I was tired and I have a big week coming up with overseas travel. So I scrapped my to do list and went for a walk, only a 15 minute walk from my house to my local nature reserve, down the back lanes to fairy land. I contemplated going to visit the Shire (a flat meadow dotted with cute houses by a river), but instead headed down to the troll bridge next to the witches cottage and stood leaning against the fence watching the water tumbling down the weir. I haven't been down here for so long and I had forgotten how magical this place is. As my health improves this will be my go to walk, no bumping into people complaining about the weather, life, the kids, the youth of today, brexit - just peace and quiet. The only people I saw a lady doing her garden and the postman passing in his van.
I felt my thoughts still, and answers to some questions came into my mind, I could see solutions and what I need for the future.
The overthinking gone, a thing that doesn't come very often now, but a strategy for the future in times of need.
So now to relax and recharge and feel free of the inner voice in my head.
Haulwen's inner voice - "Ahh not so fast my lovely, have you noticed how every walk you take ends up with you seeing the postman?" "Oh no! Damn that must seem weird. What if he thinks I'm stalking him? Why would I even think that? What if he thinks it weird that wherever he goes I appear? I live in a village of course I'm going to bump into the postman? I now need to find a route where I don't bump into the postman as he probably thinks I'm weird. I now need to apologise to the postman for being on his route!"
So inner voice F**K OFF is this the best you can throw at me now!
Welcome to my inner voice, time for a warm bath with healing salts and essential oils, to shut up my self-doubt fairy's latest attempt at take over. At least the self doubt is around really silly things now!
What does your inner self doubt voice say! Anything as silly as mine?
have a fab week
The Magical Mojo Coach
Image: Jozef Klopacka's Shutterstock